I have my copy of Angel #34.I think this issue gives us the answer to some of the weird stuff going on in Willingham's run.
I would also say that this issue is the Angel version of the Buffy episode "Where The Wild Things Are" and Buffy Season 8 #34 but played more for laughs.I actually thought this issue was a hoot.
Basically while Illyira is trying to mate with Connor,she's in heat and has been giving off a massive amount of pheromones that have been effecting everyone around her.I get the impression,and I could be wrong,but since Illyira has entered her mating cycle,this has been going on and in this issue it reaches it's peak,pun intended as Illyria finally tries to consummate with Connor due to the short window her mating cycle runs.
So what we got is while Illyria is trying to seduce Connor,everybody else is trying to seduce each other due to Illyria's pheromones being given off.Everybody is trying to have SEX with each other.This issue is SEX,SEX,SEX!Although nothing very graphic(nothing like Buffy Season 8 #34).
So we got Kate and Dez trying to have sex with Angel.It starts out with just Kate and than Dez walks in and wants to get into it for a threesome.At first Angel is trying to fight the effects of the pheromones but eventually gives in.
Kate enters Angel's bedroom.
Angel naked under his covers:What are you doing in my room?
Kate:Sorry for waking you Angel.If you want to go back to sleep.
Angel:No,I should get up for the night,but why are you here,Kate?I can't recall you ever just walking in before.In fact I don't think you've ever been in my bedroom before.
Kate taking off her jacket:Well,I just got off shift and I wanted to talk over the James situation.All my sources have come up empty.We need to find him,soon.Find out what he was up to...why he infiltrated us for so long,posing as an actual angel all the while.And I'd like to discuss your long-range plans concerning Connor.Are you really thinking of letting him continue to run the team?
Kate takes off her gun belt,badge,shoes and begins taking off her shirt.
Angel:All good subjects in need of discussion,Kate,But....Are you taking your clothes off?Why are you taking your clothes off?
Kate in her underwear:Well,as long as we have to spend this time together,why not do it in bed?We've had this unresolved sexual tension between us for so long,percolating like a..no,I think simmering's a better word for it.Simmering like a...my point is,why not just get it out of the way and not have this hanging over our head like a sword of Damocles,hmmmmm?
Angel:Because it isn't professional.I don't want to risk running our working relationship by yielding to a momentary----Hey,That's a great bra.
Kate:Isn't it?I got it on sale from Sweet Boutique on Robertson.Pretty hot,huh?Want me to leave it on or take it of?
Angel thinks about it:Umm...Ah,what the hell.Leave it on.I can remove it later with my teeth.
Angel patting the pillow next to him:Get in here,Honey Biscuit.
Later in the issue Dez enters.We can't see Angel and Kate,just hear them from a shot of Angel's hotel bedroom window.
Kate:Okay,I think we both agree we should've of done this ages ago.Just promise me this isn't making you perfectly happy.I don't want you losing your soul again because of me.
Angel:Don't worry,sweetie.This is great,but it's hardly perfect.
Dez in her nighty enters.
Angel and Kate in bed with Kate in the missionary position
Angel:What are you doing in my room?
Dez:Well---Uhm---I found myself suddenly in the mood for---Uh---Do you want company?
Angel looks at Kate with a smile:I'm not sure.What do you think,Honey Dove?
Kate with the same sly smile:Would it make you happy,puppycakes?
While this is going on,we've got Spike trying to seduce and have sex with Laura Weathermill.Like Angel,Laura tries to fight the effects of Illyria's pheromones but quickly gives in.
We go from what we saw in the preview pages with Spike in Laura's room wanting info on prophecy to the very next pages with them and Spike is already stripped and in his boxers.And yes,they have the little red hearts still.Laura makes fun of them.
Laura:Now what are you doing?
Spike in nothing but his heart shaped boxers:Well I've clearly changed my mind,haven't I?You're not really as unattractive as you attempt to be.
Laura embarrassed and trying to avoid looking at Spike:WILLIAM!Put your pants back on,this INSTANT! Put everything back on!Or---Oh hell.What am I thinking----or atleast take those ridiculous shorts off.Try to be more mature.
Spike crawling onto her bed:This is going to present some interesting problems in both process and architecture.
Laura annoyed:Nonesense.You're a vampire with supernaturally enhanced strength,dexterity and senses.If you can't find a way to work around a few obstacles,and still get the job done,than what good are you?
They are talking about the casts on her arm and leg and how to get her clothes off with them so they can screw.
Spike:True.I am just that great.
Laura:Let's just see if we can do this without further injuries,please.And seriously,what's with the ugly shorts?Are you twelve?
From outside a window at the hotel
Laura:Honestly,William,pay attention.If you'd just lift a bit here,you could get my bottoms off without ripping them.
So the hook ups are...
Betta George/Laura's polyphemus sphere is even jokingly teased as a joke.
They are the ones who figure out what's going on.
Betta George:What are you doing in my room
'What are you dong in my room' is the joke since that's how every sexual encounter in this issue begins with.Connor says it to Illyira.Laura says it to Spike and Angel says it to both Kate and Dez.lol
Betta George:What are you doing in my room
Polyphemus sphere floating into Georges room:Good evening,Betta George.Forgive the intrusion,but I thought we should get to know each other better.Since it looks like we'll be working together in the future.
George:That seems a fine idea-HRRM-Do you prefer MISTER
Polyphemus,or are you comfortable with the more relaxed standards that pertain here.
Polyphemus:Simply Polyphemus suits me fine.
George:Fine then.Forgive the lack of circumspection,but is anything amiss?You seem troubled,than again this is my first encounter with one of your kind.
Polyphemus:Not troubled,no.Just confused.I'm not certain,but I get the sense that there may be a massive amount of sex occurring in this structure tonight.
George:Oh that.That's just a by-product of Illyria being in Heat.She's putting out a truly impressive amount of Pheromones,which seem to be affecting the others.I'm tempted to make a wry Pon Farr reference,but few seem to get my obscure humor.
What puts an end to this is that Illyria misses her shot.Connor wants more time to consider but than immediately gives in to the pheromones but Illryia misses the time frame it had to happen.It had to happen that very moment and Connor's delay in deciding screwed it up.She missed her optimal breeding mode.She now is no longer interested in Connor although in a 1000 years when she can breed again,if he's still around,she would still be interested then.
Connor confused:Why'd you stop?I give up.I did the best I can.But I can't resist any longer.You're so incredibly hot,I---
Illyria pushing him away:Please quit pawing at me that way,Connor.It's gone.It's passed.
Illyria:We delayed too long.Missed the window of opportunity.I'm no longer in optimal breeding mode.We'll just have to wait for the next occurrence in my cycle.
Connor stares at her.
Illyria:Luckily for both of us,there's a reasonable chance you'll still be alive and fully functional in a thousand years.Barring the unforeseen Apocalypse of course.
Connor:But....? A thousand years?But---
Illyria:Of course I'm capable of non-productive sex until then,But not with you.I hope that doesn't make you feel inadequate and interfere with future arousals.But those qualities that make you superior breeding material don't automatically transfer to my preferred tastes in strictly recreational fornication.
We then catch up to the other couples.
Angel in his bed mortified and covering up while Kate quickly is putting her clothes on and Dez is making a hasty exit.
Angel:So we're all in agreement?We never talk about this,right?
Dez running out the door:Agreed
Kate pulling on her jacket:Not in a million years.
Spike sitting on the edge of Laura's bed only in his boxers:What exactly happened here?Strike that.I know WHAT happened,but why?Don't take this wrong,Love,but you're not exactly my cuppa.
Laura with half her top still off:I don't know what caused this,but I know what didn't/It wasn't attraction.I am so completely not interested in you.Believe me,this is going to be investigated.
We also get a little more on Connor's warrior women and the soul sucker who sucks a client's of Angel Investigations soul.This guy stiffed A.I. and she is going to use him to get into A.I.She sucks the guy's soul who will be in her thrall for 24 hours and than die.During the thrall period she will use him to go to A.I. and say he had a change of heart and want to settle up his account.He'll take the soul sucker with him and introduce her as his daughter.And I assume she'll then attack Angel and the gang.
The next part of the Eddie Hope backup was really good.The Eddie/Gunn talk with Gunn as Eddie's prisoner is intense with one hell of a cliffhanger.